Another very long spell without having written anything. It is a difficult thing to find the time when one has a young son that demands attention at every waking moment.
But it is late now and my son is now in bed and I am afforded some quiet time and have a cold beer in hand.
So, let’s get right to the point with what has been on my mind recently.
I have experienced and learned enough in my short life to come to the conclusion that humanity as a whole walks in a daydream. By this I mean we are content to believe whichever story was told to us regarding the creation of everything, who and where we are and what is going on. This is location dependent and from childhood we adhere to the creeds and beliefs that permeate whichever location we happened to be born into.
I have come to understand these stories as simply that. Religions are a collection of stories to explain the most fundamental and important questions one could possibly ask!
1. Who / What am I?
2. Where am I?
3. What/Where is here?
Ask these questions to almost anyone and they will come back with a very sure and confident answer. This is quite ironic because one could ask what the capital of Montana is and most people wouldn’t be able to give a confident answer.
But in regards to existence and reality they sure they have the answer and that their answer is the correct one.
I have reached a state of mind where this question both fascinates and terrifies me. To really understand my level of fascination and fear one must be of a similar state of mind/consciousness. As I mentioned above, I find that most people walk in a daydream with only a slight bit of wonder if they wonder at all. This wonder/fear should be amplified a thousand fold so much so that it permeates all of their thoughts, that even though they go about their day it lurks in the background of their mind like a persistent shadow.
I have come to admit I really do not know what I am, where I am nor do I know what is going on. I’ve accepted the fact that this could all be a computer program created by ourselves who did advance, advanced so far they could create universes upon universes and in turn inhabitants of those created more universes and so on.
I’ve accepted that this cycle of the universe expanding and contracting could be going on for infinity with no beginning, no end.
I’ve accepted that this reality could simply be one thought of an infinite mind in a line of infinite minds, all contemplating infinite thoughts.
I’ve accepted that truth and reality is most likely absolutely astounding and terrifying that if I were to understand it immediately and in its entirety at this moment I would most certainly go mad being unable to comprehend a fraction of it.
All of these scenarios seem much more possible to me then the fairy tales of religion that the majority of the human race believes. I continue to be shocked in the realization that otherwise very intelligent and rational people cling to these stories and set them as an integral part of their lives.
All I know is that I have thoughts and these thoughts come weather I would like them too or not. They are a constant stream and only with practice can I control the intensity, duration and subject of these thoughts.
I also know that I cannot share these thoughts with everyone a lá Facebook. I write these things here on my blog as a record for my own benefit and that of my ancestors. Most people these days use Facebook and use it in the same way they use/take pictures. They post a lot but do not organize their thoughts, ideas become scattered and eventually everything gets lost.
As far as I know I’m the only one that uses a blog for a journal of my own life and physically retains absolute control of the blog. I write these words that are recorded on a box just behind me with plenty of backups.
I keep this journal with the extreme foresight that my ancestors will have such technology that they can easily peruse everything I have written here and gain a very accurate portrait of their ancestor.
Yes, I think ahead.
But getting back to the nature of reality I find I could not have any interesting discussion with the majority of people I know. There are very few “free thinkers” out there and the majority of people I know are quite content to retreat into the only thing they know which is established religion.
Why do these thoughts permeate my mind at the moment? Well for one the internet has afforded all types of new ideas and thinking. The second is that I’ve experienced quite a few things in my own life which really do not have an easy explanation.
I’ve found that when strange things occur people prefer to ignore/forget them as their brains are running at full capacity but still cannot come up with an answer and thus the only conclusion is to disregard that which cannot be explained.
I prefer to contemplate the big questions, I want to know what is going on and I choose to be fascinated with life and the desire to understand. As far as I know, there are not many who share this desire.
What was the recent sports score again?